Ep #113: When Your Goals Aren’t Moving You

“People are not lazy. They simply have impotent goals. That is, goals that do not inspire them,” Tony Robbins. I have been thinking a lot about potency lately, that is power, that is to be able, the ability to carry out something which is within you, to see it to fruition.

I’ve been thinking about this for myself as I reevaluate the last year, the last three years, the last 10 years. I’ve been thinking about it for my clients. Thinking about the places where I have succeeded, they have succeeded, and the places where there is still that gap, and places where we’re still confused about why there is a gap.

And I do believe that one of the keys is understanding potency; the potency of our actions, the potency of our dreams, understanding that just because we say we want to create something, does not actually mean that we want to do it, and how to know where this misalignment with our values or perhaps a contradiction of values actually causes impotent goals and dreams.

So, listen in today because as you’re starting out this New Year, this is something that takes a deep dive. But doing the work up front can make the difference, not only between success and failure, but the difference between a life where you could have all the outward markings of success, but it still feels empty, it still feels dry and like something is missing and you’re not hitting the mark, versus a life that feels deeply fulfilling and meaningful.

You are listening to The Art School Podcast; a show for artists and creatives who want to become the next greatest version of themselves. Learn how to cultivate an extraordinary way of being and take the mystery out of making money, and the struggle out of making art. Here is your host, master certified life coach, artist, and former lawyer, Leah Badertscher.

Welcome, everyone, to another episode of The Art School Podcast. And happy New Year. I am actually recording this for you on New Year’s Eve 2020. And I, like so many of you, love to use this time of year to pause, to reflect, to evaluate, to listen to the wisdom that’s speaking to me through my experiences and the experiences of those who I have the privilege to share a life and an orbit with, to harvest that wisdom and to lean into the stories and what they are still yielding. And to be grateful and to celebrate those things, to feel things that are still left there for me to be felt and explore and discover. And also, of course, to dream about the coming year and to plan for the coming year.

And it is so much of that reflection that has inspired the topic of today’s episode. So, we will get to that. And before we do, just shortly though, a little bit of a catchup, because I feel like it’s been a bit since I’ve spoken with all of you, since I had prerecorded the last couple of podcasts before the Christmas holiday. And I just wanted to share some of what the last couple of weeks has been and to say thank you to those of you who have reached out and shared with me already how you participated in the season of miracles.

That has overwhelmed me in the best sort of way. You’ve heard me say before, I make a practice of not indulging in overwhelm. But I will let myself be flooded by hearing about the grandness of your spirit and your love and creativity and the goodness that you are spreading and sharing in the world.

And it’s such a gift too to be able to witness it up close and in my own home this season. I think one of my favorite things about this Christmas season was the fact that my children all made Christmas gifts for one another, or they spent a little bit of money to get something for their siblings.

And so, months ago, like six months ago, my youngest two, at their Montessori school they had this little sale and my middle son, Sammy, had taken his own money, $5, to buy a jump-rope that is made out of recycled plastic grocery sacks for his sister Blaise. So, he has been keeping that, hiding that, guarding that recycled bag jump-rope for months and has had it wrapped for several weeks now. And so, he just could not wait. He was bursting to have her open that. And she loves it. And it’s actually very kind to our wood floors. So, we’ve been letting her use it inside the house too. So, that was so sweet.

And then, my oldest, Elijah used some of his own money and bought his middle brother, Sammy, it’s a comic book, but it’s a blank comic book. Because Sammy loves, loves, loves Calvin and Hobbes and has taken to that, and has taken to coming up, like, drawing his own comic strips. Sometimes heavily inspired by Calvin and Hobbes, but with his own take on it too.

So, he has been drawing comics. And so, Elijah bought him this book that’s basically lots of blank comic strips. And Sammy was so pleased with that. And also then the sweet irony was that Sammy had drawn Elijah his very own Calvin and Hobbes inspired comic strip with Elijah playing a role in this particular strip.

So, that was so sweet. And then Blaise, a few weeks ago while we were back to online schooling, and I think I was actually trying to write a podcast and she had finished up her online homework and asked if she could make a snow globe for her brothers for Christmas. And I thought, well that’s an inspired idea. Go right ahead.

So, she asked if I had any glitter. And I said, “Yes, I probably have some glitter in my office somewhere.” And then, I think I was probably just subconsciously on some level knowing she was up to something, but also just not going there, because I had some quiet for about 30 minutes. But it was quiet for 30 minutes. I didn’t think anything of it.

And then later that day, she comes with these two ball jars, glass jars with plastic lids on them. And she had gone to their rooms, taken a couple of their, like, favorite rocks that they had picked up along Lake Michigan, and put them in this ball jars with some liquid and a whole bunch of glitter.

And I was like, that’s so sweet and inspired and I’m glad you were resourceful and got that done. And then, it was the next day when I ventured back down to my studio. And I walked in and it was like the inside of my studio was a snow globe of glitter had exploded. Because if you’ve ever worked with glitter, you know it goes everywhere.

And so, hard to be upset with her though because it was so sweet and she was being resourceful and also glitter does get everywhere. So, it was pretty easy cleanup. So, she had given that to them and they were both, like, amused by it. Especially the part where she had stolen their own rocks to put inside the snow globe.

So, those were some of my favorite things from our Christmas. And then also just to celebrate our first Christmas in this house, that was such a gift. And a long time coming. So, I soaked it in and got up early and had the lights on and my coffee and again, just reflected on the blessings of this year.

I think another gift I had too was just the morning of Christmas Eve, I woke up with the best feeling in my heart. It has been a year – it has been a year, right? I don’t need to restate that too much. And I am a deeply spiritual person and lean into that for solace and strength and I try to be a source of depth and strength and peace for others in my life. And this year, I have felt shaken many times, like deeply shaken, and felt very anxious sometimes.

And it’s not like I have been without troubles in my life or difficulties. I certainly have. I think some of them would astonish you. And still, I also am grateful for the depth of strength that I have been able to find, and grace. And at those times, it never felt like that. It felt like just barely getting by or bouncing along, along rock bottom.

But I can appreciate those for the character and soul-building experiences they have been. But this year has been difficult. And while I have had my own back and been grateful to myself and to friends and support, and family, and to God for helping carry me through, there have still been times that my heart and mind have been restless, anxious, troubled. And so, it just really felt like a Christmas miracle to wake up Christmas Eve morning with this feeling of deep peace and gratitude and a depth of quiet and a quiet joy and an expansiveness.

And I was trying to put it into words for one friend who was particularly always great at sensing exactly what the words should be. And she had said, “Goodwill. Goodwill towards all people.” And that’s what it was too, which was such a gift to feel that amidst this year when there was so much conflict.

And so, in some way, I wanted to – while I can’t quite convey the experience of that with words, I wanted to do my best to share it with a story and share it with you and hope that that energy, that that goodwill towards all people somehow is carried across these internet waves to you as well.

Because too, I’ve also, as I mentioned, been hearing back from you already some of the miracles when you were participating in my miracle-making episode. Thank you so much. And two – there have been more, but two that I just want to mention and celebrate – and I won’t share anyone’s names. But I think that I want to share the essence of this story.

One was of a healed relationship of someone who felt like there was really going to be no way out, no healing available in a marriage. And they asked for help, not only from a higher source, but reached outside of themselves. And it came in a way that healed all parties involved. And that is such a gift to hear.

Also, another story someone shared that they – and this is actually something that they had done before this episode, but they felt inspired to share their story with me after listening to the episode was that, several weeks ago, they contributed a lot of money to save a horse that was headed towards the slaughterhouse. And instead, they funded its happy retirement at a rescue ranch in Colorado. And that’s such a beautiful story as well.

And I know others of you are out there working miracles in big and small ways. So, thank you. And if you are inspired to share, I would love to be a witness to your story. And I won’t share the details of it, definitely I would respect our privacy. But if you would love to have a witness, I would love to hear your story.

So, now, this brings me to really the substance for – the main content, I should say – for today’s episode. And I wanted to begin with another story about a horse, actually, an abridged story.

A few years ago, I decided to gift myself a retreat for a book writing experience. And it was with Laura Munson in the Haven Writer’s Retreat in Whitefish Montana. It was a beautiful experience. I think I might have mentioned it on podcasts prior to this.

But one of the elective activities that you could choose during the retreat was to do horse whispering work. And I have done Equus coaching before. I absolutely love it. And so, the opportunity to blend my creative work, take my writing intentions, and then also do this horse work was something that I jumped at.

And I was not disappointed. It was very powerful and has stuck with me ever since in ways that I think about every day. Because it turned out to be not only about my writing, but my creative work in general, my Creative work with a capital C, all the work I do, including now with this podcast and with my coaching practice, with my art, really anything, any way that I show up in the world.

So, what I did – and again, long story short, and I won’t go too much into explaining Equus coaching here. Maybe in another episode, or I’ll have someone on, maybe an Equus coach on sometime to talk about the power of horse whispering, quote unquote, or Equus therapy, Equus coaching.

So, what I did was I took the intention that I had for this particular writing project with me, with the intention that I thought I had into the ring, into the work with the horse. And the way you begin with this horse work, this particular one that I was doing anyway, was you hold an intention in your mind of what you want the horse to do. And I was holding it simultaneously while holding the energy of the intention that I have for this book.

And I went in thinking, “Okay, my intention for this book is that I want it to be a bestseller.” And I went in with that. And really, me wanting it to be a bestseller kind of epitomized other things that I wanted for other areas of my work at that time, including making money and growing my coaching practice and growing my creative career as an artist, selling more paintings.

And when I went in with this energy, this intention, and I am a very strong willed, strong minded person, the horse did not care less. The horse did not pay any attention to me, was not interested in me, did not move. And so, the woman, the coach that was facilitating this said, “Well what do you make of this?”

And I started to speak, but then I just, like, broke down in tears. And she said – she let me cry for a little bit. And then she said, “Look, do you see that the horse is now paying more attention to you?” And this horse was definitely more interested in me now that I was crying. And she’s like, “What do you make of this?” And I’ve done some horse work before, so I knew that the horse is responding when you are in your power, in your authenticity and integrity with yourself.

And in that moment, when I was balling, I was in integrity with myself because I was heartbroken. And she said, “Tell me about this.” And I said it’s because I feel powerless, like I feel impotent, like what I want is not enough to move the world. I can’t even move a horse.

I mean, granted, it’s a very large beast; much larger than me. But it’s not interested. So, to me, the horse not being interested was a reflection of the world not being interested in me. And as I was speaking aloud and the woman facilitating was just listening, I could start to put together what was going on. Like, the horse, the world not being interested in me or my work. Was it because I was not really interested in me or my work?

But instead, I was trying to force some outside effect without really first tapping into the place of potency for me. Which is to be deeply in love, deeply moved by what I’m doing.

And she said, you know, “Well why do you think that is, that you’re not allowing yourself to go to that place where you are tapped into deeply loving what you were doing?” And being deeply interested is a light word, but believing deeply in it, being moved by it yourself.

And I just started crying again because I don’t – that’s just me. And I don’t think that is enough for the world. And then again, the horse seemed really interested in our conversation then, and started to get closer and walk over more closely. And it also was like the place where I felt very raw, but it also felt powerful and refreshing because I felt more settled in my body. And I felt that rather than trying to do something, like force something intellectually with my mind, I was back in my center and back in my truth, which felt very vulnerable. And then also, just true.

And even speaking about how perhaps my truth is not good enough to create certain dreams that I had, that still felt better. It still felt like truth. And so, I realized that that’s the place where meaning and fulfilment come from for me. In trying to force things with my mind, I can for sure, because I am very strong willed and I am very smart. I can accomplish certain things and make them happy. But it comes at the expense of feeling hollow and empty and disconnected inside. And it’s not fooling me. And in this instance, it was for sure not fooling the horse.

And so, I wrestled for a minute because it felt like, to let go of that bestselling book dream, it felt like I wanted to sit with that. Was that a resignation? Was that being smaller? Was that settling and saying that I’m not good enough?

And so, I sat with that and took my time and closed my eyes and got back into that place in my body that felt like truth and I realized it was, you know, it’s along the lines of things I’ve spoken with you and with those in the Art School, my clients about before. And that is finding your third way.

I hadn’t yet found out in the world, like, a path to follow of someone who looked like me doing things my way, in a way that blends coming from this deep spiritual place and also this deep intense place, a place of deep live, with also being able to effectively create something in the world. I was really kind of scared that if I just relaxed into this place of truth, that I would be impotent in the world, that maybe I’d feel great, but maybe I also wouldn’t because maybe I would be giving up and saying that no, I’m actually not good enough to create the dreams that I also want to create in the world.

So, I could feel I had these two conflicting beliefs or values going on. But one of the benefits of this horse work is you’re not committing to anything or writing it in stone, but it’s a place to play and experiment and it’s a proxy, like a safe place for what goes on in the world. So, I decided, if I could risk it anywhere, I could begin by risking it there.

So, I just settled into holding a space for myself where, coming from my heart, coming from that energy of loving my own work and loving my own way of going about it, that that could be not only enough, but sort of take the question of enough off the table. That that was really everything, that that was really, like, why I’m here, and a part of the secret to my meaning of life.

So, staying in that place of that honest truth energy of my heart, that place that has caused me to cry, I held onto that energy. And then also, asked myself, “Well, does this mean you don’t want to write then? It’s okay, if that’s actually not a true desire of yours, that’s okay, even though you’ve spent all this money to this point, developing, writing, even coming to this retreat, that its okay, Leah, if you want to put that down, if it’s not actually yours.

And I found I actually didn’t want to put it down, that there is something there that’s core and essential and speaking to me. So, I held that and said, okay, well let’s hold onto that, that there is something here about the story that wants to be told and that you want to participate in the telling of it.

And then, let’s just decide for the moment, the bestseller thing, but what does speak to you when you stay in this energy of the heart? And then, what I got was an image of the times when I have loved a story. When I have finished a book or watched a movie or heard someone else’s story and thought, “Oh my gosh, thank you for that.” That it somehow opened up new worlds to me, that there was a healing in it, that it was just like purely amazing in its own regard and made me think, “God, human beings, how incredible this is.” The times when I’d finished a book and clutched the book to my heart and was thanking the author with my heart and mind for having written it and just loving it.

And I realized, it was that feeling of beloved-ness. I want to participate in a story that is beloved; beloved first by me. I want to participate in a story that I want to feel that way about in the telling of it. And I want to participate in the telling of a story where other people have that same gratitude that I had, that same beloved reaction. And as I was doing this, I opened my eyes and then there’s the horse walking closer and closer. And the coach remarked, “Well now, whatever you’re doing, you’ve certainly got his attention.”

And so, while simultaneously holding this kind of energy of coming from a place of love, of beloved-ness, I then also held, in my mind, intentions of what I would like the horse to do. And it’s this tricky place because you get too much in your head and the horse would be out of it, and just entirely in the energy of the heart with no intention in the mind and the horse doesn’t know what to do.

So, it is this art that is the art of creating anything, staying in the energy of it while also holding a vision, the intention of, in this case, did I want the horse to move around the ring, to follow me, to change directions? It’s powerful work.

And one of the great gifts of it is that it’s in your body and in your mind. It’s a mind, body, spirit connection that you experience. It’s experiential. So, you get it in that experience and then you can take it with you and you have that state of being, that way of being. And I talk about that a lot right, the way of being in mind, body, and spirit. It’s like, “Oh, now you know what that feels like, to be connected in mind, body, and spirit, connected to yourself. And then it’s like you can be connected in harmony with things moving out in the world. And it’s a very potent way of creating.

So, since that time, I have used that experience as an inner north star, as a barometer, as a compass. And I cannot say that I’m able to stay on it 100%. But it is something that I use to try to guide myself back if I am feeling lost or if it feels like things are not working.

And this story is one of the reasons I chose the intro quote that I did from Tony Robbins about, “People are not lazy. They simply have impotent goals.” Because I know this may be a time of year when you are looking at goals you have set, dreams you have had, and you’re maybe frustrated at why you haven’t been able to move the needle, why you haven’t been able to move that metaphorical horse for you out in the world.

Maybe there’s something that you want so deeply, and you’re working so hard, and yet again, the horse isn’t interested, the world’s not interested. Indifference is worse, it can feel like, than a negative reaction, right? And I look at places in my own life where I’m really able to move the needle and where I am very potent with my actions, where I’m able to create a lot and it doesn’t feel like I’m forcing or overthinking or over-functioning.

And then, I look at those places in my life where there is still, it seems, like excessive frustration or heartache. I look at, for my clients, what things seem to really be working for them and where still are we looking for that master key? Where does it still seem like they are in a cycle of frustration and struggle?

And I’ve shared this before, but something I often return to, because I find it so empowering – it’s not a way of being hard on yourself, it’s a way of empowering yourself – is just let yourself allow this space where even if it’s not true, you do it just because it’s helpful to consider this. Say, “Okay, if I don’t have this result, let’s assume it’s because I am not choosing it.

Because that then gives you all the power back. And so many times, at first, we’ll have resistance because we’ll be like, of course it’s not true that I’m not choosing this. I want this so much. I want to make more money so badly, I want this relationship to be healed so badly, I want that job so badly, I want to have a baby, I want to have whatever you want so much. I wouldn’t choose the absence of it.

So, put that aside for a moment. And for the purpose of exploration and discovery, play with me here and say, okay, let’s say I must not really want this like I say I do because I am not choosing it. And I want to choose to be a powerful creator. And if you’ve been listening to my podcast or you are one of my clients, have been in the Art School, this line of inquiry is not new to you.

But what I am introducing you to today that is a nuance, and coming at it from a slightly different angle, is this adding in an inquiry of is what you want actually an impotent goal or dream for you? Does it actually not move you or inspire you?

I really thought that bestselling novel inspired me, bestselling books. Who wouldn’t that inspire? But when I took it into the ring with the horse, it’s thousands and thousands of mirror neurons, so basically the horse there is like a mirror for what my actual truth is. If it’s not moving me, I’m not in my place of power. I can’t lead from there. The horse will not let itself be led by me.

And that experience of the horse taught me an invaluable lesson in that my brain was convinced that power would come from having a bestselling novel, writing something that the rest of the world would easily consider a bestseller, that that’s where power came from.

But when the horse, as a mirror for me did not move, what it showed me is that I actually wasn’t in my place of power, that that actually is not a place of power for me. When instead, I was shown that moving to a place where I’m in alignment with myself, where I’m focused on coming from my truth, which is loving the process, creating something that would move me, that I would love, and being so immersed in that kind of energy, that knowing that certainly if I love it this much, it will have this beloved life-changing effect on others too. That is the place of power.

And if that means a bestseller, so be it. But it wasn’t this sort of reverse outside-in paradigm of power that my brain was trying to convince me that I really wanted. And life works better for me when I come from this place of – I mean, it’s a place of potency for me.

And I have shared this story, a longer version of it with my clients. We had one of our virtual retreats for the mastermind, and I shared with them my simple plan process and then I also shared this, which is like the simplified version of the simple plan. From that experience, I drew a symbol to help remind me of this inner GPS, this compass.

And it’s a heart with vibrating lines around it because when I’m in that place, I can feel the energy radiating off of me. When I am in that place, I know that what I’m going to do works. And I know it so much that it is that place of detachment where I also don’t care if it doesn’t work. It’s caring deeply and then also not needing the evidence.

And it is also from this place that I created the vision of the moonshot vision, of the $2 million a year as a creative, as a writer, as a coach, as an artist, and doing it on my terms. Because that to me is like this equivalent of moving into the horse ring with this intention to bring something into the world. It is, “Can I be in this place?”

And this work, it sounds easy. But it takes practice and it takes feedback in the world and it takes practice over and over again. But coming from this place of can I come from this audacious intention that who I am at my core, that coming from my heart, that I can hold that and also hold the intentions of creating beautiful things in the world, of creating impact, of creating abundance, of creating opportunities.

So, it’s similar to the story I shared with the horse where, in my time there, once I found that energy, that place of power for me, that place of potency where I could be in that energy in myself and then also hold intentions in my mind, it’s not about erasing the intellect. But it is about rebalancing the faculties available to me and putting things in alignment, faculties of imagination, the vision, the vision of a book, the vision of a story.

This particular story is also germane to this entire topic. It is about a modern mythology for women, for artists, for creatives about rewriting, living into a mythology that is spacious enough to serve us and to serve our thriving. So, balancing that faculty of imagination with the intellect that I do have, but then also honoring this central essence of who I am, this heart energy, this spirit, and letting that radiate and acknowledge it, honoring that, and that that is not only a very real thing, but not something to be dismissed, not something to be sublimated, not something less than. And even if mysterious, also powerful, and necessary in our modern world.

And there’s this other quote from Jung that I wanted to share from one of his books along these lines, because it goes to, again, the places where I see – I see very highly intelligent, capable, responsible women and then places where they’re not creating the results that they are capable of creating, being the creative powerhouses they are, or that comes at such a great expense. And it speaks to that, this excerpt from this book does. It’s from the Memories, Dreams, and Reflections book.

He writes, “I have frequently seen people become neurotic when they content themselves with inadequate or wrong answers to the questions of life. They seek position, marriage, reputation, outward success or money, and remain unhappy and neurotic even when they have attained what they were seeking. Such people are usually confined within too narrow a spiritual horizon. Their life has not sufficient content, sufficient meaning. If they are enabled to develop into more spacious personalities, their neuroses generally disappears. For that reason, the idea of development was always of the highest importance to me.”

So, this brings me to the part of the podcast where I want you to do more than just listen. I want you to lean in and really work with me, coach with me. So, let’s go back to those words from Carl Jung.

He writes, “For that reason, the idea of development was always of highest importance to me.” That idea of development. In your goals and your dreams, for in the past, you can evaluate them, reflect on them through this lens, and for the future. Like, do they have the potency that you need?

Is there fear in your mind that if you give up on them, you will somehow be settling? That’s worth investigating too. But even if they are as grand as a bestselling book, are they still too small for you? Is there enough room for development? Are your goals and dreams spacious enough for the truth of who you are, for the expansiveness of who you are? Is there enough content? Is there enough meaning?

And I am not saying – believe me, I am not saying give up on any of your goals and dreams. I am offering you the invitation to call them back and see, do they need to be infused with a different understanding and meaning.

After listening to so many hundreds now of people talk about their goals and their dreams and their successes and their failures, I feel like I have developed a sense for where and when they are going to be successful in the future. And that is partly because there is this place where even thinking about it in terms of success for a certain part of people, it’s like it takes their heart immediately out of the equation.

And I want to offer a paradigm where you can confuse the two, but you may, for a while, it may help you to put down the idea of success and think about meaning and think about content, think about what moves your heart, what stirs you. Begin there and then bring things back in, like the numbers.

I am definitely a fan of fusing both worlds. Sometimes though, I think have been so meshed in the world that is strictly about goals as these check-off things that we need to do or accomplish or thinking of ourselves as a CV, a list of achievements, a resume, rather than thinking about the human soul that we are and the spaciousness that that requires in life.

You know, I thought, for this time of year, I thought about doing an episode where I helped you walk through an evaluation of what’s working and what’s not working and asking yourself one of these central questions, which I do think is a powerful question to ask. If you look at where you want to be, that vision, that dream, and where you are now, from a place of non-judgment, can you answer why you were choosing results you currently have and what’s different about that person who is already living into them. You know, what’s different, putting aside some time, the passage of time and other things that need to happen? But what are the differences?

That is a worthy question and that is a very, valuable process to go through. I also wanted instead though to lead with the story that I led with because I could tell you and some people will walk you through, “Well, you need to have different systems in place. Clearly, I know the numbers inside and out myself. That’s a part of this life journey that I have learned to be competent, beyond competent, very good at, I know what the numbers are. I know what the numbers will be at a different point.

I also know that the real journey for me is not just having the numbers add up. Because I know plenty of people who have the numbers and then some, and still live this this, and Jung calls it, this division within themselves. They still do not have that sense of fulfillment, of being at home within themselves. And what I am looking for is can I create in the world, as myself? That to me is the example that I want to be, not being able to just go through the motions and push and grind and do the numbers and follow systems and formulas. There are those differences. But I want it to flow from who I really am, and not me forcing and not me having to be something I’m not in the world, which was one of the greatest takeaways from that horse whispering experience for me.

I realized, one of the reasons I’m not choosing and didn’t want to choose a bestseller is because there was a deep fear that I would have to be something I’m not, that I could go through the motions and I could achieve, just like I had achieved earlier in my life. I could become a lawyer. I’m smart enough to do that, but it felt like also a denial of who I am in order to achieve. And it didn’t actually come from a place that allowed me to channel potential potency, truth, power.

Also, something else I realized in that horse whispering session, and then once again, the same lesson rose to the surface as I’ve been doing my own reflections when I asked, you know, what is the difference between myself right now and the woman that I am growing into? And I realized, again, that my most powerful self actually has a much deeper ease with letting go of control of certain things.

She is much better at surrender, at surrendering to who she really is, and allowing that to be more than enough. Because the dream for example of a bestseller was a way of trying to control and manipulate the world. If I could have a bestseller, then I could prove to the world that I’m good enough, and therefore I could trust myself that I am good enough. See how backwards and circular that is?

And now too, when I think about myself creating a seven-figure business and beyond and creating much more impact and beyond, I’ve realized the difference is, ironically, she is so much better at relinquishing control of many things, including people pleasing, once again, including what people think of herm once again, which is also one of the reasons why this is the podcast you’re getting this week.

Because it feels like a very vulnerable podcast to me. It feels like a surrender. It feels like honesty. It feels scary to me. It feels like I’m saying things and doing things in a way that others in my industry are not doing it. But it also, to me, feels like I’m back in that ring, coming from a place where I’m in my heart and that energy is radiating from that.

And I’m trusting that there are those of you listening who that’s the mythology you need, is that you can come from that place, that that is a powerful place and I do believe that if I’m connected to something bigger than myself, that’s part of why I’m here, to channel that message that that really is a potent place to come from, a place that will offer so much creativity to the world, so much healing.

So, to sum up this coach with me, if you think about where you want to be, living into that dream, where that dream is your reality and you think about who you are in that dream, what are the differences? And not just the number differences.

We can talk about that. And I love tat too. That’s fun play for sure. But today, I want you to think about what are the differences in terms of spirit, in terms of the spaciousness that you are allowing for all aspects of your life, the way you conceive of yourself and your connection to Greater questions in life and the world? Greater with a capital G.

And are your goals, the way you’re relating to your goals and dreams currently, are they impotent? Do they truly inspire you? Or is there more exploring there for you to do? Is there something yet there for you to tap into that will make you come alive, the kind of truth and potency that when you tap into it, helps you not only move a 2000-pound beast, not only move mountains, not only move the world, but stirs your own soul on a very deep level and awakens that genius, that giant within?

Thank you for listening to another episode of The Art School Podcast. If you’ve enjoyed these episodes, if this podcast has been meaningful to you, has helped you move the needle and inspired you to your own dreams, the best thing you can do to keep that good energy moving, to be part of the rising tide that lifts all ships is to share, is to subscribe, is to go to iTunes and leave a review.

I appreciate so much your efforts in helping me organically share this podcast. It’s been so gratifying to hear from you and to connect with more and more of you, especially on these free workshop calls that I’m offering every month.

So, if you want to go deeper into this work, make sure you are signed up on my mailing list for those free calls. The best way to do that, you can go to support@leahcb.com. We will make sure that you have everything you need so that you have access to those calls and that you do not miss one.

We also have a week-long possibility immersion workshop series coming up in January. This is going to prime you to have an incredible year. It’s going to be a place for you to come and soak up and take this work more deeply, the concepts I talk here on the podcast, but really immerse yourself in the energy of possibility and that can-do energy where you really go out and move the needle.

And it’s been amazing in these immersion experiences in the past what people create in a relatively short period of time. And this is a very low, very accessible price. So, if you’ve been on the fence or considering the Art School, this is a very doable, easy way to jump right in. And you will also then have all the recordings available to you. So, you can take them on walks, relisten to them, revisit the content throughout the year and for years to come.

Also, we have just a few weeks remaining in January for the early bird tier pricing for the March session of the Art School. So, if you want to take advantage of that, also please email us, support@leahcb.com and you can also sign up for a discovery consult with my team, or have more information about signing up for the Art School, or if you just want to make sure you are in for the session, you can go to my website, www.leahcb.com and register to join us for that March class. And then you will also have access to the possibility immersion week, that’s included then, and also bonus calls that we are offering in the months of January and February, bridging this time period until we dive in deep in March.

To close today, I wanted to leave you with two thoughts from two great creative geniuses about the importance of story and mythology. The first is, again, from Carl Jung. And he was writing about this phenomenon of he’s calling it neuroses, the phenomenon of being divided against one’s self.

And I think this is, you know, you’re divided against yourself if part of you wants to create something, and yet you’re also not choosing it and you know you’re not choosing it because you’re not actually creating it. And there is ensuing struggle, anxiety, depression, all manner of things.

So, he writes that, “If these people who are experiencing this division against themselves, if they had lives in a period and in a milieu in which man was still linked by myth with the world of the ancestors and thus with nature truly experienced and not merely seen from the outside, they would have been spared this division with themselves.

“I’m speaking of those who cannot tolerate the loss of myth and who can neither find a way to a merely exterior world, to the world as seen by science, nor rest satisfied with an intellectual juggling with words which has nothing whatsoever to do with wisdom.”

And he goes on to say that, “There’s something that’s so agreeable about conceptuality that it promises protection from experience. But the problem with this is that the spirit does not dwell in concepts, but in deeds and in facts.”

That’s why I think it’s so powerful to combine this intention of actually creating something in the world with doing this deep inner work, this spiritual work too, these things happening in tandem together.

The next thought that I want to share with you is from Clarissa Pinkola-Estes. And she writes, “I hope you will go out and let stories, that is life, happen to you, and that you will work with these stories. Water them with your blood and tears and laughter until they bloom, until you yourself burst into bloom.”

The power of story, that’s really the final thought I wanted to leave with you today because at this time of year when we can reflect, but sometimes there’s this tendency to be overly heavy-handed with evaluating the numbers side of things, and we neglect this aspect of ourselves that needs story. We neglect the potency of story. We forget how transformative story is for human beings in our healing and also our growth.

So, think about the stories of your past, have gratitude for them. And think about the story, the beautiful story, the powerful story, the heartbreaking story, the courageous story that you are living into in the coming year.

I am so grateful to have all of you be a part of my story, and me, in a small way, be a part of yours. Thank you for being here. Have a beautiful week, everyone, and I will talk to you next time.